I had several friends with little ones who were starting school for the first time. It was exciting to watch them go through the emotions and preparations. Now for me, the oldest is still in college, so he does his own thing and the other two are still in high school. This is my middle son’s Senior Year, so I was a little sad. In twelve years of his school years I don’t remember feeling emotional with him. He was the middle child, so he never was the one, who triggered the “first” or “last” because there was a brother before and after him. This year was a little different for me. My sophomore and senior accompanied me on the first day of school. I had to go to the high school to drop off some parent paperwork and I was feeling fine. We exited the car and my senior shot me a wave with “see ya, have a good day Mom”. I could feel my heart sink… this five foot, eleven inch tall young man, shuffles off in the other direction of me to meet up with friends. As my sophomore and I walk towards the front door, my senior was lagging behind as more and more friends gather around him. There is no way he will acknowledge me as his Mom.
Meanwhile, my youngest didn’t mind me walking with him into the school. As my son directed me to the area down the hall I needed to go drop off my papers, he said, “bye, Mom” and ran off towards his friends. I walked down the hall to the office to drop off my papers and the attendant looked up at me and said, “Ah Darlene, you have a senior, this is the last year of school for him”. Then it hit me, my middle son now had his “first” and “last” moment… today was his "last first day of school". I couldn’t speak, I was afraid if I made any movement the tears would start flowing. She continued to look over the paperwork making sure everything was in order. I thanked for her time and wished her a great day and turned towards the door. I could see all these kids racing pass the door to meet up with friends they haven’t seen all summer long. Now, my biggest worry of the moment… to see one of my boys. Please, God, let me make to the parking lot before I become a blubbering idiot. I stepped into the hall and I can hear the giggles of excitement amongst the kids. I made my way down the hall, trying not to focus on anyone’s face. One part of me wanted to recognize one of the faces as my boys so I can wave one more time and then the other part was hoping I wouldn’t with the fear they wouldn’t wave back because it was un-cool.
I made it to the front door but it was jammed with kids trying to get in. I finally made it through the crowd and headed across the parking lot. As I made it to the car, I looked back and silently wished my boys an awesome day and school year, then the tears start rolling down my cheek. This was an incredible day in the “Memories of Mom”, it was an awesome “last first” moment in my book of life.
